No use crying over ruined pj's?

     This afternoon after working all night last night and being up running round town doing errands all day with the hubs we finally get home and I of course decided to get comfortable which means I want to put my jammies on. Now I don't know about yall but I sleep in my pj's at least twice before washing them and I will admit that 90% of the time they will lay somewhere in the bedroom floor until they have been worn for the second time, unless of course by some miracle they make it into the clothes hamper.

     So this afternoon was no different than any other as I look at my bedroom floor and spot the black 80's inspired jammie bottoms(that were just purchased last weekend and had only been worn once so far) and I immediately decide yup those will be perfect, I pick them up and to my horror I find that there is a huge hole in them,now you'll remember I said I had worn them once only.

     My mind automatically flashed back to Wednesday (July 4th) when "the dog" had been up in her cage for most of the day(notice I only referred to her as "the dog" instead of the usual "precious our baby"?). Then I think about yesterday, and how she refused to stay in her bed so she ended up sleeping in the bed with me most of the day...Can anyone see where this is going?

     You see "The dog" has somewhat of a "I'll get you back" nature, and no this is not the first time she has sought revenge on items belonging to me, but this is the first time that her spiteful ways have ever made me cry. As I walked to the living room to show Scott "The dog's" malicious act, I could feel the tears welling up inside of me. "Look what YOUR DOG did" I said holding up the jammie bottoms and look at him through the enormous hole she had chewed. He starts to laugh, which only hurts me more "It's NOT funny" I yell and then, I toss the pants in the trash can as I walk to our bedroom and slam the door.

     I had just covered up when Scott walks in and with the sweetest voice says "don't be mad at me". All of a sudden the tears that had been building since I found the jammies with the hole poured out and I explained to the wonderful man I adore that "I am not mad at you, it's just everything is changing" (I start a new schedule at work on Monday which means I lose Friday nights with him*Update schedule didn't change THANK YOU GOD and a child I have become very attached to at work will be leaving soon, getting attached is a no no in my line of work, we know that the children will be leaving its just a matter of when). Then I said with tears still rolling "They are just pj's but they were MY pj's and I cant ever have anything nice"(which is definitely not something I should be confessing over my life). Scott just rubs my head as I continue to sob and I finally say "and I'm just so tired".

     I'm not quite sure if he understood that I meant I am tired since I have been up since 10 last night, but I am also emotionally tired...If you follow me on facebook then you know that we have another fertility appointment made for the 26th of this month which means obviously that we have still not conceived.

     If you have had infertility issues in the past then you know the kind of tired that I was referring to, I am tired of being upset, I am tired of seeing others have what I want so desperately, I am tired of hearing "it will happen" I am tired of giving it time. I am tired of crying over it, I am tired of loosing sleep over it, I am just tired...The "I" word simply put,  SUCKS!

     No matter how tired I get though I still pray to our AWESOME God, The very God who will move mountains for me, the same God who loved me so much that he gave HIS son for me so that you and I could live eternally! When I think about what a love that must be it gives me goosebumps!

     I know that God will give us the desires of our hearts, his word tells us this in Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart".

     Last Sunday at church our wonderful Pastor talked about the fact that God does not want us to worry and if we can just grasp the fact that if we give our "problems" up to God he will give us rest Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

     So for this week I am challenging you all as well as myself to cast all your cares upon him, and receive rest from the only one who can truly give you the rest you are looking for. And don't go crying over spilled milk, spilled perfume or in my case ruined pj's! Side note---- being the wonderful man that I love so dearly, Mr. Hubs decided that he would let me take a nap after my mini melt down. He returned about an hour later with supper, PIZZA of course and me a new pair of pj's needless to say that put a big smile on my face!-A